I met a girl named Victoria
And suddenly I knew the meaning of euphoria.
It was like she had fallen from heaven
(‘Cause from one to ten, she was an eleven).
I thought, in truth, it was an angel I’d seen,
Because no one more perfect had ever been.
There was a shimmering smile in her eyes
That no mere mortal could have devised.
‘Course I’ve never been a religious man—
Never one to think there was a master plan.
But I was struck dumb on Earth that day,
And for all my words I could not say
What it was that she meant to me…
‘Cause together’s something we could never be.
Yes, perhaps there’s some perfect world
Where I end up being with that perfect girl.
Where hell freezes over and pigs can fly
And she breaks up with her perfect guy.
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